Woman Hospitalized to Remove Jammed Deer Tongue She Had Used To Um, You Know…

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The Arkansas woman, who’s name has not been released, went to her gynecologist complaining that her discharge had a “very bad odor”. [T]he results of the pap smear were not human. During the exam, the doctor inserted his speculum, and scooped out a large piece of loose, decaying flesh.

The woman finally confessed. After her husband’s recent hunting trip, he brought home a deer and gutted and dressed it in their garage. She admitted to seeing the tongue, admired its length, and had snuck off with it to use it as a pleasuring aid.

She didn’t remember leaving it up there.

Wait…didn’t remember? Come on, people, necrophilia is no excuse for lack of basic hygiene.

Via Daily Buzz.

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I design video games for a living, write fiction, political theory and poetry for personal amusement, and train regularly in Western European 16th century swordwork. On frequent occasion I have been known to hunt for and explore abandoned graveyards, train tunnels and other interesting places wherever I may find them, but there is absolutely no truth to the rumor that I am preparing to set off a zombie apocalypse. Nothing that will stand up in court, at least. I use paranthesis with distressing frequency, have a deep passion for history, anthropology and sociological theory, and really, really, really hate mayonnaise. But I wash my hands after the writing. Promise.

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